Create The Life You Want

A great deal has been written and said about how to create the life you want, so, how come so few people actually manage to live the life of their dreams?

I believe that basically people go about building their lives in the wrong way. Generally speaking we focus far too much attention on material possessions and high status or highly rewarded jobs and insufficient attention on feeling “good” and expressing our true nature.

Our problems start at school. I ask you, how much knowledge of any real value did you actually get out of school? For instance, were you taught how to think? Did you have any lessons about how you operate yourself? Were there classes on visualisation and creativity? Did anyone tell you how to open a bank account, or get a mortgage? Did you learn what actually goes on in the world of work, or even how to get a job? Did anyone spend any serious amount of time helping you to work out what type of job would suit someone with your talents and abilities? And when it comes to sex, love and romance let’s not even go there.

In my personal experience of school there was a big hole where I might have been taught something about expressing myself through my work, earning a living, how to choose a career, what it is like working in different environments, what is expected of the employee and how to make myself valuable to an employer.

With the education system failing so miserably in the job of preparing us for earning a living and life after school is it any wonder that so many people end up feeling frustrated and unfulfilled? It is a great shame that so many of us spend the years when we have most energy and the fewest commitments floundering around looking for a medium through which we can express ourselves and experience a sense that we are doing something meaningful with our lives as we seek to earn a living.

The only reason why I eventually stumbled onto a career path that has proved personally rewarding was that I had to find a way to overcome the fears of doing wrong, of failing and of insecurity that the education system had been largely responsible for instilling in me. It was these fears, combined with a self-image that I was a failure and good-for-nothing, which had been repeatedly said to me at school, that drove me to search endlessly for an identity and a means of proving my worth.

The strongest lesson of all that school taught me was that I am a “lazy, idle, good-for-nothing.” So, I accepted this opinion of me, because important people had said it – but, fortunately, something inside of me did not quite believe it.

Actually, with the benefit of my life’s experiences, I have to say that I don’t believe in laziness. I believe that people who are classified “lazy” simply have not been inspired or allowed to do what interests them. It was certainly true that there was little that interested me at any of the schools that I attended and nothing, except perhaps for sport, inspired me.

The conundrum is that we all get caught in the education trap. It goes something like this: to get a good job you need a university degree, to get into university you need good school results, to get good school results you need to go to a good school and study the subjects that they teach. So from the beginning of our school years we are trapped into a system that is designed to get us a “good job”. The problem is that the system takes no account of individuality. It is designed purely to mass produce university graduates who, ultimately may or may not get good jobs. Nobody in the education system, including the government, seems to be asking the 64 dollar question: “what skills and abilities do we need school leavers to possess in order to meet the requirements of industry, commerce and the professions?”

But, what is a good job? There are two possible answers:

Answer 1: a good job is a job that pays well, provides opportunities for promotion, gives job security and a good pension at the end of your working life.

Answer 2: a good job is a job that offers you opportunities to express yourself, challenges your creativity, offers you fulfilment and an energising work environment. Hopefully you will also be well rewarded for your efforts.

However, the sort of jobs that comply with answer no.1 often also come with drawbacks like, promotion only to dead men’s shoes, bullying, autocracy, paternalism, rules that restrict you, lack of opportunity for creativity and self-expression and boredom.

For answer 2 there are no fixed types of jobs, there is only what is right for you. How on earth do you find such a job or means of earning a living? It is a path with no certainties. The way is littered with risk. The excitement can be enormous, the journey can also be frightening!

Perhaps, by now, the question that is uppermost in your mind is: “is it too late for me to start again?” Fortunately the answer is, “no it is not.” Having been through the mill myself and helped over one thousand other people through the mill I believe that there are some worthwhile answers. In the pages that follow we will explore those answers in order to help you to achieve a life of happiness and fulfilment.

I do not claim that it is easy to reinvent yourself, or that it is without risk. But I can tell you from personal experience that it can be very worthwhile both economically and in terms of job satisfaction. And, as a recent Gallup Survey found, “success comes more easily when you are using your inherent talents.”

You are now about to set out upon a journey of self-discovery which will provide the map for you to then journey into a life of happiness and fulfilment, should you choose to follow the route that the map provides in order to Create The Life You Want.

About David Ferrers

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1 comment

Gitaanjali Taneja - 9, March 2016 Reply

Not easy to reinvent but definitely possible with your guidance and support totally looking forward to this journey your further posts

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